Someone needs to slap a big reality check of gratitude in my face because I've been focusing on the negative. That isn't a typical Elise-ism, but it has happened over the past couple weeks. I've shed a few tears over our Christmas situation this year.
You see, it's going to be a different Christmas for us. We are supposed to spend it in England, but with Marky's new job it's hard to get enough time off to make a trip across the pond (and for that much money...oh holiday fares!). I'm heartbroken about it. I love England and our family there so much. I want to be there with them so badly.
Mix that with a dose of...
My little brother will be with my dad in Miami.
My little sister will be in Connecticut with her fiance.
And sometimes as a child of a divorce that didn't happen until after I graduated college...well, sometimes I just mourn not being with the family that I grew up with for almost 25 years.
And sometimes as a child of a divorce that didn't happen until after I graduated college...well, sometimes I just mourn not being with the family that I grew up with for almost 25 years.
But enough of that.
It's time to stop the tears and the pity party and start being thankful.
I'm thankful for my faith.
For my husband who I adore with my whole heart.
For health...because last December I went to and from the hospital constantly to visit my sissy.
For the fact that Mark has a great job.
For his hard work that gives me the opportunity to be more creative, write more, and still spend time with some fabulous kiddos.
The list could go on for miles!
I discovered this song this year. It's about your love being your "home for the holiday." I love it...love the feel..love the rhythm...love the lyrics. It makes me want to slow dance with my hubby by the fireplace!!
My favorite lyric of the song is "I'm thankfully yours." This is so us this year! It's a good reminder that home is wherever I am with Mark. And I wouldn't trade that for anything in the whole wide world.
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| Elizabeth Scott Photography |
I will be thinking of you throughout the holiday! We too, are going to be spending Christmas away from family. We are too far away and flights are too expensive for us to travel, so we are just going to celebrate by ourselves. I can relate to having your parents divorce later in life. My parents divorced about 3 years ago.. it helped me to be in Hawaii and not CLOSE during the "drama".. but I miss those family holidays and the traditions and the memories. It will never be the same.. and that's so sad! If I did go home, it would be hard splitting my time between the two (they still live in the same town).. I hope you guys have a GREAT week!! :)
ReplyDeleteAwe girl....I'm sorry you are all so scattered about the country/world. Make the most of this precious time with your hubby and friends! Sometimes I wish we could just do that here!
ReplyDeleteThis is a great post. We all need to stop sometimes and focus a little less on the negative and much more on the positive.
ReplyDeleteWhat a great perspective to have! Even though our holidays look different as we grow up it's inspiring to see you embracing the stage of life you are in at this very moment. Soak up all of those precious moments with your hubby!!
ReplyDeletehugs to you friend. Sometimes as we get older trying to get together with family. I too have family scattered it really sucks (especially my sister being 12 hours away) but at the holidays it is even more sad....but you are so correct we need to focus on the good!!! Ive been doing this a lot myself when times get tough gotta look to the good.
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I've been a little sad too that I don't get to see any of my family whom I haven't seen in 6 months but I am constantly reminded that we have a daughter to share Christmas with this year and it warms my heart and makes me feel completely blessed for the gift that she has been to our lives this past year! Thanks for the encouraging post!!
ReplyDeleteI LOVE this post. I desperately wanted to go to England for Christmas to see Simon's family but with money and jobs it just isn't going to happen this year. Thank you so much for posting such a lovely song and sharing
ReplyDeleteI can totally understand the "divorce after college" situation where all of a sudden, nothing's the same. I hate that I have to go between two homes, but I am extremely lucky that my parents still live nearby, so it's easy to visit both. My mom has a new boyfriend and we have to juggle when he's visiting versus when my dad comes to visit so it's not awkward. I wish it was how it was my entire life...easy! I will be thinking about you in these next fews weeks...I know it's hard, but you're right - home is where Mark is! I always remind myself of that. ;) (Well, my home isn't where Mark is, it's where Chad is!!! Haha)
ReplyDeleteChin up friend! I know how you feel though. Being a child of divorce (at the young age of 5) I understand how you feel. This Christmas doesn't feel so Christmassy to me either, but its probably because ive had such a hard year that I am ready for 2013 to be over and 2014 to provide me with some wayyyyyyy better news. Here's hoping you get to go home to England very soon! HUGS to you friend. :)
ReplyDeleteIt's very easy to get wrapped up in the negative feelings when you know that you won't be with family for Christmas. This year will be different for me as well. I'm used to being with my family throughout the holidays, but this year my fiancé and I are having to split Christmas with both of our families. It's going to be different and something I've actually come to tears about, but in the end I remember that the most important thing is that we have each other and two loving families who want to spend the holidays with us. Good for you for remaining positive through it all! I know how hard that can be.
ReplyDeleteThanks for sharing Elise. The holiday's can be so hard. It's difficult enough when you have divorced parents to try and balance during the holidays (my parents divorced when I was in college) and then when you add in your spouse's family too, it makes it hard to juggle! It seems like a battle every year no matter how much I think I have it all worked out...
ReplyDeleteHugs to you from Kansas sweet friend. I will be praying thY God grants you great peace and unimaginable joy in the coming weeks. Love seeing the love you have between you and Mark. You are so blessed with each other!!
ReplyDeleteGirlfriend, you can have a little pity party every now & then! I saying just crying it out from time to time is a good thing! I remember feeling so empty & alone a few Christmas' ago. My brother was working on Christmas so, we celebrated with my Dad & him early, Matt's family gets together at Thanksgiving, not Christmas & for some awful, dumb reason Matt & I had decided to not get each other gifts that year. I woke up Christmas morning to an empty house (just Matt & I), no gifts & no family to rush off & see... it was a rough one. Looking back though I had so much to be thankful for though. Embrace this time with your hubby though... might not ever have another Christmas like this one! :) Big hugs sent your way!!!
ReplyDeleteThat picture of you guys is gorgeous! I'm so sorry that you've been feeling blue lately, sometimes that can happen around the holidays when things don't go as planned. But don't you ever forget how blessed you are! I'll say a little prayer for you to feel better love! :)
ReplyDeleteI love your honesty! It is hard to always be thankful but sometimes we look at the bigger picture and realize that there is so much to be grateful for. It is hard to be without family on the holidays and I am so happy for you to have such a wonderful husband! I hope you get to England soon sweets! xo
ReplyDeleteI'll be thinking of you! My situation is different, but it's hard not being with your family throughout the whole holiday season, when that is what you are used to! Much love to you and Mark! xo
ReplyDeleteI'm sorry the holidays are so scattered for you, but looks like this is a year for you two to start your own traditions!! I don't blame you though - I would want to go to England too!
ReplyDeleteLove this and really needed it. So blessed to have you in my life! LOVE YOU!
ReplyDeleteThinking of you guys!! So sorry your original plans didn't work out. It's hard to not be with all of your loved ones on a holiday as special as Christmas! This is my first married Christmas so we will be spending it with my husbands family and not mine.. and as much as I love being with them, it will be strange to not see my own family! But you are right, it's important to remember that HOME is now with my husband! Thanks for the reminder today!
ReplyDeleteI needed this. My family has decided the past couple of years to go up to their cabin (which is 14 hours away) every year for Christmas and with my daughter schedule we just can't make it happen. at all. ever. I get so frustrated and feel like they are so selfish but I need to remember that even though they're gone that I still have my little family here :)
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I know the feeling..my parents live in a different country so the holidays can be lonely without them. Air fares are also ridiculous at that time so it makes it hard to afford. We've come up with a new plan: we spend Christmas day in the US and then travel to my home country a day or two after when the rates have gone down. We then do a late Christmas with my parents and we're there for NYE to celebrate with friends and family. I hope you get to see your English family soon!!
ReplyDeleteMy parents got divorced a few years ago after 20 years, so I understand where you are coming from. I have been trying REALLY hard this year to focus on making new traditions for our little family and with my parents! It is easy to focus on the sad parts, but luckily we have amazing husbands to spend the holidays with!
ReplyDeleteSo happy that you two have each other! I know it has to be hard...but good for you for going ahead and making the choice to be positive and full of joy!
ReplyDeleteThank you for sharing your heart today sweet girl! The holidays can definitely be tough when they don't seem to go the way we'd hoped - I have been feeling the same way (as you know from my post yesterday). And then I too was convicted about all of the wonderful things I have to be thankful for! Sometimes we just need a little reminder;)
ReplyDeleteTHAT PHOTO! Swoon!
ReplyDeleteElise, I totally get this. As a child of divorce (at 15) I still mourn those Christmases with my entire family. My husband and I live away from both of our families now and we rarely make it home for Christmas because of the cost of flying over the holidays. Christmas has become more about our own little family and the new traditions we are making together now. I am sure you and your husband will have a very special Christmas with just the two of you :) xox
ReplyDeleteI just *attempted to start a linkup on Mondays for all the Monday haters/general grumps. Ever since I posted it, I've stumbled upon various blogs that have already made a list of "the positives." Sometimes, it's easier to start new happy traditions instead of lamented old ones, even though they probably helped define you. One of my favorite quotes lately is "there is no future in the past" Cheers! :)
ReplyDeleteSuch a great reminder to always change your perspective. I catch myself getting fixated on the negative, but your heart is truly in the right place and I just know that your holidays are going to be wonderful!!!! xoxo
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ReplyDeleteLove you, love your heart, love your vulnerability...sending lots of hugs and love to you, sweet girl!!
ReplyDeleteThis is such a beautiful post. My holidays have been in constant flux recently too and I have felt the same way, so thank you for sharing!! It definitely helps!!
ReplyDeleteaww girl. I totally know how that goes. It is so hard to split your time with family far away and divorced kids never have it any easier, even as grown ups! Sometimes it totally stinks and is not fair. I'm glad you have found some positives to lift your spirit. I hope you guys find something fabulous to do for Christmas and have fun making a new tradition(s) of your own this year!
ReplyDeletegreat post...thanks for the reminder. Exactly what I needed to hear too, you're not alone girlfriend! Adorable picture of you and the hubs too!! Happy Tuesday! xx
ReplyDeleteThat's a very nice picture of you and your hubby. I'm glad you were able to find your joy admist the disappointment. Holidays are very special to me and if I couldn't be where I wanted with who I wanted I'd pitch a fit and cry about it. Luckily, since hubby and I began dating our holidays have always worked out where we get to spend time with both our families- that becomes hard when you have a child and EVERYONE wants to spend Christmas morning with him. Even though its not exactly what you want, I pray you have a very blessed Christmas!
ReplyDeleteThis is such a great reminder for me! Thanks for shining light on where our focus should be!
ReplyDeleteElise..as a grown child of divorce, I am with you, sister. I actually have a blog post coming up about it. I try to turn it into a positive...the real reason it is hard is because I want to be with EVERYONE I love and it can't be that way anymore. But that I have al these people I love. Anyway, I just decided I'm going to write you an email instead. :)
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That is tough. My siblings and I are grown children with divorced parents and it's rough still (even though it's been 8 years). Great reminder to be grateful. I love reading your blog because it causes me to keep my blessings in the front of my mind.
ReplyDeleteThat is tough.. My parents divorced when I was two and it's still difficult. You dodo good turning to positive and I def need to remember to be positive right now! Thank you! Xxoo
ReplyDeleteThat is really tough and hard when you want to be with family but can't. Im sending you a hug lady!
ReplyDeleteThe lyrics to that song are so moving, and your favorite line is beautiful. As is your picture :)!
There's something about the holidays that can be super disappointing! There's so much build up and expectations. I really try to focus on the traditions and things that bring me joy. Every year we do a Teddy Bear Tea at a nearby hotel, my friends have a gingerbread party, and we see the nutcracker. Make your traditions and you will feel better!
ReplyDeleteSweet girl, I'm so feeling for you during these holiday blues. I've definitely been there with family stuff in the past, I think we all have at some point, and it's never easy. But you are SO very lucky to have a wonderful husband that you know you'll spend the special day with, no matter who else is there or how your new traditions look. You're a blessed lady! Smile, friend :)
ReplyDeleteyou are so wonderful & ya'lls Christmas will be amazing. As a child of divorce as well I still travel on Christmas morning to see my Dad's side, then back to my hubby's side then to my mom and step-dad and his family (which to me is my closest family- my step dad came into my life for a reason and he is my main man- such a great man I could go on and on). It is so exhausting and we don't even have kids to lug around yet! haha I get kind of stressed and tired just thinking about it but in the end I really truly wouldn't have it any other way. Sending positivity your way and Merry almost Christmas! (also, I wanted you to know that from a post of yours awhile back, I ordered "Jesus Calling" for my mom and myself for Christmas- I had never heard of it and I'm looking forward to reading it and following along)
ReplyDeleteTime to whip out the twin card again! Oh dear can I totally relate!!! There have been so many times this year that I just wanted to be back 'home'. Times so full of tears only to witness a moment of joy/happiness to lift my spirits back up! God is so good and he will most certainly see you through this moment lovely. I'll be praying for you gal - much love to you and yours this time of year!!!
ReplyDeletePs. Not sure why but that song totally brought me to {happy} tears!
ReplyDeletePraying for you guys. Listening to that song made my cry. I'm actually glad I found your blog. I enjoyed reading it. I'm new to North Carolina and I haven't found a church please pray for me. God Bless and have a beautiful and blessed Christmas and a New Year.
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